i used to be a writer. from the time i was sixteen years old until the past year or so, i religiously wrote in a journal, finishing one journal every three to four months! i used to blog semi-regularly. i used to write poetry. i wrote a 250 page dissertation. now, however, i have to scrape the corners of my mind for something to write (or, something to declare, as julia alvarez has eloquently written).
it wears on me, not because i'd like to consider myself a "writer," but because my job requires that i write. "publish or perish" is a common adage in academia. if i can't manage to blog or write in a journal, how am i to produce a well-conceived, well-written academic article?
the other day one of my girlfriends from texas sent me an article that she'd written about a tejana activist who helped organize a protest for educational rights for mexican americans in the early 1970s. i started to read it, and i could sense the passion that my friend had for this woman's story. and i remembered that i used to have that, too.
i used to know a guy in mexico who would tell me that he wrote "cuando le llegaba la musa." i always thought it romantic to be waiting for a "muse" to inspire a person to write. as i got more serious about my writing, however, i realized that it was as much about discipline as it was inspiration. these days it's difficult for me to conjure either one or the other.
right now i'm supposed to be revising an article about mexican american women in farm labor during the 1950s and 1960s. i've been putting off this revision for a LONG time. i don't know if it's a lack of passion or inspiration. maybe it's a good old fashioned fear of writing.
i think that i'm looking a place to begin. maybe blogging a little more can be a place to start.
@>-->>---
5 comments:
I think sometimes it's just about getting into a particular rhythm or habit. I initially started blogging because I was searching for a narrative voice of my own. I'm not sure I've found that yet, but I think blogging has definitely helped me jump the hurdle of writing. I think you still have the passion--I see it in your posts about teaching and our conversations. You just need to put it on the page.
thanks for your faith!
Si se puede!
Um, I'm perfectly okay with writing blog posts. The trouble comes with the academic writing.
Wow ~ a new look and everything for your blog ~ it's very nice; and I love the title of this post. ~ While I don't consider myself a writer by any means, not pros or academics like you and la rebelde anyway, I do relate to the mysterious relationship we all seem to have with writing ~ with finding our voice, making it stronger and louder, and continuing to fill it with passion. I'm more like your friend in Mexico and his muse (and I have no discipline about writing). Some nights, the muse shakes me up and forces me to stay up all night, until the final sentence comes out ~ she will not let me go to sleep without spitting it all out. Sometimes I look back at posts I wrote years ago and wonder how in the world such passion came out of me. You ~ you are at a good place to start (again) ~ here on your blog, where you tell us your stories. I look forward to reading more ~
cindy--hey, i saw a report that you co-authored in my department the other day!
mari--i hear what you're saying about finding your voice. i feel like i used to have a "voice," but maybe i've lost it. thanks for the encouragement.
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